First and foremost you ( and everyone posting to you) have been in this "bs" for lack of a better word, for much longer than I. I may even be out of line to post to you, who knows?
You are a very intellegent man Frank, and in almost every aspect of life that is beneficial. There are times however, that can work against you. I have never met you, but I have seen enough to KNOW that your a very good person. The positives outway the negatives by far.
Now this is from one overthinker to another....
I have one close friend I open up to outside of the DB boards. One. He has been in a similar sitch. and he knows me best. I was venting to him one day.(one of many) He looked at me with a sh*t eatin grin and said." Do you know what your problem is?" I said What?! He said, Your too much brain and not enough balls. Frank, at first I wanted to deck him and he just grinned. Please don't take offense to this. I am by no means directing that at you. It opened my eyes though.
Frank, Your a great man and father, who desires to become better after walking through hell.
SIMPLICITY
Take some time alone and picture the "Frank" you desire to be, this part should come pretty easy.
Now, Little by little, bite by bite, MOVE to the "Frank." For YOU and only you.
It doesn't matter how small the movement is as long as your moving.
Lack of knowledge is not your problem. You have THE best offering their advice and your already extremely smart.
Keep moving toward "Frank." No matter how big or small the step, just keep moving. If you have that mental image of "Frank." there is nothing left to think about.
Keep your guard up, take care of your daughters, keep moving forward and Find FRANK.
