The Jealousy Button (men only)

[RobD70]

They may object to the notion on their own moral and ethical ground (That is that it transgresses against their marriage vows and religious principles) and that is their right to do so and yours if that is how you feel.... but, many of these same people also erroneously believe or let their moral "stance" on the issue cloud their thinking, confuse their own personal disliking of the tactic and leads them to deny the effectiveness of the tactic....

Having a affair is a effective tactic to get your spouse to wake up to the issues in the marriage. It is very effective.
Cheating is a effective way to win at sports.
Fraud and blackmail are a effective way to make money.
Sorry my morals and ethics are clouding my judgement, I don't buy it.

Many will say that the tactic doesn't work, that it will backfire or will do harm to the relationship that they are trying to save...but this really is not true (although of course there can be exceptions I guess).

So is it true or not? If the author has to guess, makes me wonder.

it can be the absolute quickest way to get a partner (that is leaving you) to turn their head long enough to see what they may be losing...

Absolute leaves no doubt, yet the author uses the phrase "can be" to describe the effectiveness.

This article is full of double speak and contradictions.


How come there is no welcome to the female perspective on this thread? If they are the "opposition" wouldn't we want to know what their thoughts are? I know I only control me but having a great scouting report makes preparation a whole lot more valuable come game time.

Hey Coach, I see all this as a means to an end and like was said before, is it really that different than "acting as if". Of course you can act "as if" you were dating which works too.

The author isn't an absolutist and knows there are exceptions to every rule in these cases. The probability is high and there are many stories of people doing this sincerely (not as a tactic but moving on) and found their WAS chasing them. So the options are "fake it" and date to see what happens or completely fall out of love with the WAS, date for real and become a WAS yourself as they beg and plead for you to take them back.