Uh oh...I feel a big 2 x 4 coming....First, has your c ever met your w, or seen the two of you together? Maybe I misunderstood you, but...
Why feed the anger? What does that mean?
How are you HEALING from years of stuff that has nothing to do with w? Like your childhood issues we discussed, and your professional experience (which you saw as negative but I saw differently, fyi) that are still haunting you to this day, and you can't dump it all on your w, so what's the "feeding" part thing? Haven't you been feeding negatives for a long time already, while starving the positives in your life by either not seeing them, taking them for granted or seeing them negatively, among other things?
Yes, C has been there and knows W, she was instrumental in our reconciliation 3 years ago after W's affair and crash, she knows how much I love W. She only want's the best for me.
The concept of my 'anger' is centered around the fact that I give everyone a pass when they do things I don't like, and I internalize it as me being 'wrong' or 'bad'. Instead, it's unexpressed anger. It doesn't mean I need to start running around being angry, but instead when I am being wronged I need to EXPRESS it, instead of internalizing it as if I am 'bad'.
So, I have been hurting for months now. When I should have been angry.
So when I say "I am angry" what I am saying is that instead of HURTING I'm reflecting it outward as anger. And if W talks to me about MY shortcomings I sure as hell will tell her about HER's and how they have affected me. Not in a mean way, but in an honest way.
