Starting a new topic later tonight...had good news from oldest son...I spoke to him that i thought it was time to reconnect in friendship and maybe more later on...I asked what he thought and said that his dad was thinking that we should meet again..GREAT NEWS for me...Gotta go check in later ITSY
M54 H54 married 30 years Prostitues and Other women "100's" 10/7/2004 Prostitue/Junkie girlfriend 6/04-1/07? Left 1/5/05 returned 1/9/05 Asked h to leave 4/2005 Had to, prostitues OW 5/2005 not a prostitue Divorced 9/2006
was going to start a new thread but it continues here... had all the kids and mom over for dinner had a real nice time. I love getting together with them..I am in a much better place than I have ever been. Son32 said he liked where I was in my life... at least they are noticing that I have changed. They have not been too supportive of me during this whole process. I miss understood S32 about Ex getting together. he wanted to get togehter with kids also... not with me. Son said that maybe in June at a family birthday for his son that we could see each other. It did not include me. I was not disappointed. All my kids say that I am not ready yet...Almost everyone agrees with that so I will follow their advise. I do not want to meet with him anyway. Son 32 stayed late after everyone left and talked to me about Ex.
The OW has moved in...apparently she moved in last November...but noone as usual tells me. I do not like the fact that my family likes to keep things from me..they feel that they are protecting me and really they are not. it's better if they would just tell me these things so that I can deal with it...but they don't get it. S32 and I talked a long time about the divorce and what has been going on and I wish that my family would all speak to me about it but S24 and d27 will not talk to me about Ex or anything related to ex and me. I think that they think that I will fall apart like I used to with what EX did, but I have moved so far from that place that I used to be that I feel that they should tell me me things that are related to me that I can deal with them and move on.I do not want Ex back. He has changed into someone that I do not respect and do not want in my life. He has changed into someone that I consider a creep and a sleaze...yukey words and he makes me sick to my stomach knowing about him. I am no longer where I was 3,4,5, years. The whole MLC makes the LBS change into a better, stronger person and LBS"S are much better off in alot of ways.
S32 said exMIL wanted to tell me Merry christmas and Hi!.. She is really delusional. After she called me a bitch and that I was robbing her son and took his side knowing everything I need her in my life like I still need that knife in my back. She was always a bitch to me during our marriage and now that she is lonely she thinks that I would probabaly want to be friends. She is someone that i really do not like. After all that she said and did i would like to just slap her face. But I won't given the oppurtunity I am much better than she is. His whole family took his side full well knowing what he did to me...Boggles the mind.. HEIGH HO...
I am peace with the knowlegde that OW moved in... the reality of living together is different than dating for 3 years...she won't be able to put up with his severe desire for freedom and his love for particpating in all sports. It's all about him and always has been.. I know that he still goes out and picks up women why else would he go to bars with sleezy friends? He has a girlfriend and still frequenst bars. He hasn't changed that much since MLC..
I do not know where he is in MLC or if he is still in there...would like to see him as he has gained alot of weight up to 260 S24 says...Maybe he he is out and resuming a life different than the one we had as I knew him...that is what ususally happens to them, as I understand it Juut journaling today ITsy
M54 H54 married 30 years Prostitues and Other women "100's" 10/7/2004 Prostitue/Junkie girlfriend 6/04-1/07? Left 1/5/05 returned 1/9/05 Asked h to leave 4/2005 Had to, prostitues OW 5/2005 not a prostitue Divorced 9/2006
The whole MLC makes the LBS change into a better, stronger person and LBS"S are much better off in alot of ways.
Hopefully...the real success do regardless of if the marriage was, praise the Lord, "saved!" can I have an Amen?
Kids should always want to protect their mother...they won't know how you feel unless you tell them Itsy, they'll keep trying to protect you unless you insist that they don't.
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
Dear Jack thanks for posting to my thread... I will talk with S32 since he has taken a leadership role in regards to how the kids will be protecting me..I will talk with S32.. Went to C today and we talked about what has transpared in the recnt days with particular emphasis on Ex and OW. How the kids want to protect me from "bad news"...that is not their job...I will no longer be talking with kids about EX. But I also do not want them to protect me from bad news either. I have a really great C and he has great input into situation... I went thru alot of C's before I found him. We talked in depth about role I should be having as well as the children. I will contact S32 and speak with him. ITSY ITSY
Last edited by itsy; 01/27/0908:47 PM.
M54 H54 married 30 years Prostitues and Other women "100's" 10/7/2004 Prostitue/Junkie girlfriend 6/04-1/07? Left 1/5/05 returned 1/9/05 Asked h to leave 4/2005 Had to, prostitues OW 5/2005 not a prostitue Divorced 9/2006
having a hard time lately wanting to contact ex...it creeps in all the time now..I think that I am putting myself on a rollercoaster ride. Would like to talk to him.. using alot of restraint to not contact.. ITSY
M54 H54 married 30 years Prostitues and Other women "100's" 10/7/2004 Prostitue/Junkie girlfriend 6/04-1/07? Left 1/5/05 returned 1/9/05 Asked h to leave 4/2005 Had to, prostitues OW 5/2005 not a prostitue Divorced 9/2006
Itsy, I'm w/Jack on this one. Unless he's contacted you and has acted like a civil human being, why in the world would you want to contact him now? I think you should just step back and if he wants to reconnect w/you....let him. That's the way mlcers are doing things...reconnecting with you, not the other way around. I don't think he's even close to being pleasant all of the time and you do not need to hear his anger and sprew right now.
Okay?
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I will not contact him it would do me good to do that at all. I have not talked to him in 8 months and not seen him in 2 1/2 years...there is really no way that I would ever contact him... I have to much respect for myself and I have come so far in my own journey.. I just ramble at times and lately I HAVE WANTED to contact but everyone says not too and I will not do it yet. I still have to work on GAL more and moving forward... Sorry if I upset ya'll...did not mean too...plus I would like him to contact me first... ITSY
M54 H54 married 30 years Prostitues and Other women "100's" 10/7/2004 Prostitue/Junkie girlfriend 6/04-1/07? Left 1/5/05 returned 1/9/05 Asked h to leave 4/2005 Had to, prostitues OW 5/2005 not a prostitue Divorced 9/2006
I never said NOT too. I asked what would contacting him do for you? I'm not in your shoes, I don't know if talking to him is going to set you free or knock you back onto the roller coaster that everyone seems to hate.
If it is good for you, then you have your answer, if however it is bad for you...
Experience is a brutal teacher, but you learn. My God, do you learn. - C.S. Lewis
Life is usually all about how you handle Plan B. - Jack3Beans
Listen without defending; Speak without offending - FaithinAK
I really don't know how I would react...but knowing that OW is there now living with him the scenario has changed.
I would like to see him or talk to him to see where he is in his life...if he has come out of MLC and how much he has changed. It's my curiosity mostly..I suspect that it would be favorable friendship so to say..he still loves me he has said that to my mom and I am just really curious about him. We spent 29 years together...
Everyone I know has said not to contact him. So I don't think that I will. What would it do to me I don't know propel me beyond the curiosity or drag me back? I think that it would propel me forward even more. What I have heard about him is not good. I have no excuse to talk him, so it would appear to be a call for information about him should I ever do it,and he does love himself... I will wait some more and remove myself from the curiosity or I just might pick up the phone one day and do it...But I will prepare myself for thw worst and hope for the better... Thanks for your insight jack ITSY
M54 H54 married 30 years Prostitues and Other women "100's" 10/7/2004 Prostitue/Junkie girlfriend 6/04-1/07? Left 1/5/05 returned 1/9/05 Asked h to leave 4/2005 Had to, prostitues OW 5/2005 not a prostitue Divorced 9/2006
