Jon, we know you are hurt very badly. You sound as exhusted as you are hurt. This kind of thing drains a person of all their energy. If you are a Christian, I would give you some spiritual advise and maybe some scripture....if you want. If not, then I would tell you to try to back off as best as you can to take an emotional break from what you are going through. Even if you have to go somewhere for a few days, that would be better than making a decision or action out of the state you are in right now. People often file for a D when they are in the emotional and physical condition that you are feeling simply b/c they are so frazzled with all of it they are desparate for relief and they don't know of any other way to get it. Let that be your last option. I'm not telling you to separate, but just to go somewhere for a few days to rest and get out away from it, would be better. I would even go as far as to say separate first before going straight for divorce court. I don't understand why people now days think they have to just go file for a divorce before staying away from each other and give time a chance to do some work.
If it sounded like we were being tough on you, I guess we tend to be that way at times b/c we talk to a lot of people here. We can see it from an outside POV and just tell it as we see it. When the person in the stitch is already frustrated, hurt, angry, and ready to call it quits, I can see where hearing what we say could be hard on the ears. But, do know that we all care and are concerned and most of us shoot from the hip b/c we believe in getting down to serious business of trying to bust a divorce if possible, so we don't mess around with "fluff" as one of our favorite people would say.
I hope you won't stop coming here b/c believe it or not......you will get stronger as you continue to post. We have heard so many men sound as you are right now and it is heart breaking to know how you must be feeling. It is easy for us to sit at our computers and tell you what we do, but remember that we all have been in some type of stitch ourselves, so we can tell you what we do from our own experience of pain.
Please don't give up, Jon. We want you to hang in here with us and even if you take a day or two away from the board, please come back and let us hear from you.....okay?
Take care of yourself. Sandi2
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
