It sounds like you have worked very hard to please people most of your life and it hasn't always worked out how you would have hoped. I guess my W feels the same way. She has always tried to please everyone else and then not had much reciprocated. So she is fed up with it all.
I'd say just be yourself. Don't worry so much about always pleasing everyone. Do what works for you. They will respect it once they see consistancy and know you are taking care of yourself. Its not being selfish. Its just being your own person who happens to be married (at the moment).
It sounds like you are moving along the right track though.
Kevin
Me 36, W 37 M: 08/02/97 D13, D9 1st Bomb 02/08 Reconciled 04/08 2nd Bomb: 09/08 W filed for D 02/04/09 Separated 03/09 D dismissed 06/09/09 Still separated...
