Puppy has a strong point of view and says it worked for him. I'm happy for them. But it is not exactly the DB approach and I think he'd agree with that. So, get opinions from many, and take from them, what works for you.
(( j ))
Correct; DB is not pro-exposure, pro-no-contact letters/transparency agreements. MWD is, however, big on personal boundaries.
The rest of my approach is pretty standard DB stuff -- 180s, GAL, "shine a path back toward the marriage," etc. I'm just not a big believe in what I call "The Little Bo-Peep Approach" -- you know, "leave them alone, and they'll come home, wagging their tails behind them." I think there are more proactive things that can be done to bust up affairs ("separate the addict from the source of their addiction"), that are best for both WASs and LBSs.
But I absolutely agree you have to do what works best for you. In fact, I usually only interject on someone's thread when THEY express dissatisfaction with their current approach. If it's sapping their self-esteem, hurting them emotionally, hurting their family financially, hurting their kids, etc. For those I see "standing" and holding up well, I usually just tip my cap and keep on walking -- I admire their strength.
