It seems to be working! Sometimes....

[Silent Chrleader]

Honey, you have that poor man scared to death! Remember, the way you handle your fear will teach him whether he can be completely honest with you or not.

I really think it was just a BS conversation between guys, and it doesn't deserve the currency of your pain!

It sounds to me like he has tried to reassure you, and he hasn't attacked you for listening (thus indicating something to hide). I think it's time to show him you can give him the benefit of the doubt.

Also, remember your H has a lot of guilt inside him to process, and that is not an easy thing for anyone (thus refering to himself as a f'ing p**sy with his friend). He knows he was wrong completely for the affair, but as you have said, it didn't happen in a vacuum.

I don't mean to point fingers or lay blame at all. I am just saying that you don't want to stay in a situation where he is the bad guy and you are the victim. Neither of you will ever be happy that way, and it will completely sabatage your efforts to re-build your M.

I know you love your H and want to trust him, and I know the fear is almost crushing! But, you are strong! And he needs to know that you are determined to get beyond this too, and are willing to take a risk to do so.

JMHO!!!

Take care, my friend!!