YES, men have troubles making a decision and sticking to it...RE: D, AND Mine is proof positive !!
I think you sound very good and at peace (if you will) after receiving the D papers.
I also read (between the lines) that you are very intrigued and possibly ready for a R with MF3. I say "hooray for you" for making the first move there.
Back in Feb 07 after my H had been gone for about 18 months I attempted to see another man. I was the one who started the flirt and then asked him out twice. After the 2nd date I cried all the way home and was just beside myself with grief. I decided then and there I was going to stand for my M. The guy still calls me every now and then (not often at all) just to say hello and it is OK. I know he is not who I will ever want. I am content in having made an attempt at another R. I learned a lot from that experience.
I hope your experience is a positive one. It certainly appears that there is mutual interest. If you are both ready, this could be a lot of fun!!!
As far as keeping the door open a crack for H, I have always said "I will know, when it is time to shut the door". I do believe that we all have limitations. There is a time to/for everything. Changing your locks was an example of knowing when the time is right. It must have felt like the right thing to do.
Thank you for your support in my sitch....
I look forward to reading your future posts....
We both have some exciting days ahead, I am sure....
Best thoughts being sent your way, my friend,
Sanderika
ME48/H48MLC T 33y M 28y S16 OW 8/7/05 Bomb 8/16/05 Sep 9/05 H f'd D 10/3/08 D pp'd 1/20/09,7/24/09,12/4/09 D dismissed 2/5/10 H served me D papers again 9/4/10 D dismissed 9/26/11
Hi Sanderika, Thanx for stopping by my thread & for the belated b'day wishes!
Yes, I think you were right in my thoughts about changing the locks, it did feel like the correct time. Another sign, I'm letting go.
As far as M3 goes .... I don't think I'm ready for a R yet. It is more so of wanting the feeling of being special to a man again. And him finding or wanting that same special feeling w/me. It's hard to describe in a way - but I think you know what I mean. So currently, I am happy with his friendship, innocent friendship ..... and hope that maybe we can become close friends. Sure I would like more - but need to keep grounding myself back to reality ... for now.
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
Hey Julia, I was wondering if anyone in the UK would reply about snakebite!. Really, I hope you have some fond memories as well.
So yesterday I looked online & called a lawyers office. I wanted to check into it more after M3 said their D lawyer cost $500. Found out that he probably used a law clerk, since he & his x worked on the D together & it was so cheap.
So if, I want this D to keep progressing my H & I have to have our financial disclosure & our marital agreement signed & filed by 2/13!!
I emailed him today to see if he filed the financial papers & if he wanted to use the law clerk with me. (Still deciding if I want to use them). Anyway, we will see if my H replies - no reply today. I have feeling he will not reply & avoid me instead. Hhhhmmm, wonder why the cowardly lion keeps popping into my head......
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
Well, Suprise!!!! My H emailed me back. I guess he is a comfortable distance away from me now for communication ..... since he's still in Malasia!! Ah, I couldn't resist that! Really, I couldn't.
So, no he hasn't done his financial disclosure form. I emailed him that & the M settlement agreement for him to look at. (I don't even think he had the financial disclosure form). Anyway, as you can guess, if I want this D, then I have to take charge to get it done. No wonder women file more than men, men are just too lazy to do it. Yes, I'm slamming men in general - sorry men. BTW, I found another mistake on his petition for D. Yes, details - my H is not going to like the financial disclosure form - way too much work!!
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
Do not be surprised. I did 90% of the work for the D, and am STILL wrapping up issues he has just chosen to ignore. I could file contempt charges, but can't be bothered.
Michelle, I was hoping you would reply!! I sensed you would have the same issue. You might as well, ask for his financial paperwork & fill his info out yourself!!! Then, divorcing yourself - really would apply!! (Ok, not really - but you know what I mean). So, are you doing the paperwork yourself, being a lawyer & all??
Too bad there wasn't this much paperwork TO get M - LOL - then there would be less marriages to begin with!!!
Me39, XH45 Kids 3 dogs, 2 cats Divorced 6/4/09 Tricky thing is not how you live, but how you live with yourself. (POTC)
I think more paperwork wouldn't affect M that much. When you are happy and moving forward together a little paperwork isn't insurmountable. However, when you are destroying part of your life, especially when you are already depressed, it's different I guess.
Who knows. LOL
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
So currently, I am happy with his friendship, innocent friendship ..... and hope that maybe we can become close friends. Sure I would like more - but need to keep grounding myself back to reality ... for now.