WP - Do what works - 180s are not the same for all of us - but what it true about 180s- is that they are done for ourselves first - healthy 180s help us strengthen ourselves - and put us out of our shells so that we have to see ourselves differently to some extent. While it may be slightly against the idea of not pursuing - it seems like your stepping up and asking her is something of a 180 for you - now it's just important to maintain that sense of self while with her - don't cling, don't pursue, be independent in her presence.
Feeling do change hour by hour, day by day...but we can continue to grow through all those changes...even as we mourn or feel like we're falling apart - we are growing and getting stronger...just so long as we don't regress - and so long as we don't back down to the fears that try to stop us from the hardest work we have to do on ourselves...
