I always liked the man's man, lumberjack quality of him. He made me feel safe and taken care of. Big guy, charismatic, handsome (described as a "hunk" by many"/ But parts of his low self-esteem/bullying are starting to show through the cracks of the armor I once imagined he wore.
Mom had hot-glued the foam into the basket, so Joan got a knife to dig it out; she was rushing since it was getting dark. As she almost finished, she heard a clink of metal-on-metal. She had found my mother’s wedding ring. Mom had lost it a few years before, thinking it must have slipped down the shower drain after we searched for weeks, and was very upset by it. Now, here it was. Aunt Joan gave it to me, and I wear it still. It is no small miracle that the basket didn’t end up in Good Will the next day, or the plants just simply tossed into the garbage in the dimming light. Thanks, Mom.
that is WAY cool!
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
there is never "the best", there are no limits, but a person much choose to strive for better first before they be can better
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
But in the end, it comes down to this-- If he can't love me the way that I deserve to be loved, then he was right to end it and leave. He could have done it MUCH differently, but that shows his character flaws and weaknesses.
Can I borrow this?
So much of what you wrote here speaks to me.
Wow I am so proud of you DS13. Between your 13 year old son and mine I have hope for the men of the future.
Me 54 DS19 and DS17 Married 06/1989 Divorced 01/2011
I think our xH's were separated at birth too! Triplets then!
My xH hates to read, never (not a word I use lightly) understood why I loved it so much, and doesn't communicate. I can't say he has anger issues though. He's the opposite - if someone raises their voice to him (this only applies to his friends and family, not the public) then he shuts down immediately and does his best impression of a turtle.
Of course, in the public he's very forceful and takes no crap (former police officer). VERY STRANGE dichotomy!
Donna, darlin', you sound brilliant!!! I'm so glad to see you are coming to realizations about your xH and all the ways he was lacking and not giving you the love you deserve to have.
Love you girl!
T19 M15 S19 XH47 M43 bomb12/4/07 PA5/07 S12/26/07 D final 11/17/08 Back together with no defined R 05/2010 confused....to say the least!!!
When he encouraged me to go full-time while I was still trying to get through school, he said that we would make it through anything, we always did, that he would take care of everything around the house. He told me later that he said it would be ok to work more, so at least we would have more money, that I didn't do anything around the house, anyway. Now, who knows which one was the lie? Doesn't matter...
sometimes we tell the truth thinking that we can handle something, or that the other side is greener, but once we get there it's not what we thought.
hmmmm, sounds familiar.
Me 33 H 34 S9 S3 M 6 yrs (2gether 11 yrs) EA/PA 1/2006 DB 5/2006 H wants D 6/2006 H wants ME 8/2006 H "said" PA/EA over 8/2006 H erased OW off phone! 2/2007
"It is far better 2 choose humility & change oneself, than 2 wait in vain trying 2 chang someone else."
Now, who knows which one was the lie? Doesn't matter...
No, it probably doesn't. If he's like most WAS' he will just change the story anyway to fit the current irrational thought pattern or other selfish behavior.
