Yes, I am scheming to get her fired, and I have even found her a temporary replacement (one of my own employees) but my H would have to do the firing and so far he has resisted... He does not say no: he agrees that she will be gone in '2 weeks' and the 2 weeks never come. That is one of the things that make me unsure about the future of our sitch. I feel he is still in her power, and I do not know why. Last time I told him how I felt (when we were still going to a C and we discussed it with her) he said that he was afraid of 'losing me and his job, everything'. She controls the whole office and all the finances. I am nearly at my rope's end. I really sometimes think that kicking him out again would be better than living with this uncertainty...
Just yesterday he went to work and when he comes back the passenger seat in his car is in a different position than it was Thu when we went to the movies. I am going beserk second guessing...
I cannot contact her H because some of her kids live there. Other 2 work for my H part time. She stays at the house when she goes back to see them. It would be shooting myself in the foot.
As to the MC: initially we went to 2 and my H lied to both about the EA. We quit the last in May when I discovered the real situation and filed for D. Then we started going to another for tips on how to deal with our D and she ended up doing crisis counselling for both individually. She felt split and had a session with both (the one I alluded to) in which she offered to see only one of us and refer both to a trusty MC. My H asked to continue with her (I agreed because he really needed the C) but he only went to one more session and quit. He lied to me at that point about going to she her but I found out when she sent her bill. My H does things like that: quite stupid lies instead of fessing up to things he thinks I may not like... I never made the appointment with the MC because I thought it would be a waste of time and money until he made a commitment to me and to truth.
Now that he has moved back in, things go very smoothly and he shows lots of little details (see my thread) but he never talks about his work and I am totally in the dark about the situation there. If I bring it up he says he only goes in, does his work and leaves as soon as he can. I wonder whether he moved in too soon. Should I have held out until he dropped her?
As you can see I am feeling rather down today. Not exactly optimistic. I asked him this morning to clear some time in his schedule this week so that we can talk, and he was rather unhappy about it.
Sorry to spill my guts in you thread.
"You don't throw a whole life away just 'cause it's banged up a little"
Tom Smith in "Seabiscuit"
