I wanted to check back in on you. I hope you realize that I am not trying to minimize your feelings. They are your feelings and I am sure this hurts! It would make me sick at my stomach.
When I was a snoop last year and read H's texts, there were some between him and his boss and another coworker. They made some pretty inappropriate comments. When I asked H about them, he said he didn't really mean that stuff and was embarrassed by some of it, but "What am I supposed to do when my boss says that stuff? I don't want to lose my job"...
Anyway it doesn't excuse him for being such an insensitive jerk. Of course he didn't mean for you to hear what he said, I am sure he wouldn't have said those things in front of you. But guys say and do stupid stuff when they get together sometimes. Not ALL guys, but in particular professions I think it is more common for some reason. I know the meat business is very sexist (the only women in the office are usually secretaries not salespeople), and I suppose your H's business is too?
I really do think a lot of that is just blowing smoke, not real intentions....But I understand you being upset by it all the same. Now had he said, "I am going to call up OW and try to hang out with her", that would be unacceptable. Or if he was telling co-worker about an actual experience he had or was planning to have with another woman, same thing. This sounds more like posturing....
