WAW taking a step home?

[EnergyAZ]

"We actually went out to eat together last night as a family. It was kind of wierd because she didn't really talk to me and we basically focused on our son and my step son's."


I had very similar experience, the awkward dinner. But awkward is good, it is progress. Much better than spinning into old bad habits right? I think the awkwardness is both people who want to be there, but have a bit of a wall just in case the other slips into poor form. Not sure of what to do/say out of concern it might start something, so do nothing instead and keep focus on other things. The fact she saw the experience as a positive suggests she wanted to be there and was pleased things didnt get bad. Very good sign! Keep showing her things wont sprial out and get ugly when you are together.

When both people feel more confident the other is not going to slip into poor form, things start to open up a little bit.

When you see that opening, thats an opportunity to demonstrate that time together can be GOOD...very good!

You will have to make effort to only be light and fun and avoid heavy topics like the plauge. Be flirty and cute, you know what makes her smile - so do it (you should also be aware of her boundaries so respect them)

Imagine if you are coming off an ACL tear, you arent going to be sprinting around the day after surgery. You got to tread lightly, keep the pace slow and mellow, be gentle and nurse yourself to health before you even think about sprinting again.

Right now, your relationship is catastrophically wounded, and you need to make every effort you can be to keep things light, mellow, gentle, and fun. The time for full blow rehab can come after the pain and swelling subsides

Show her how you are still the man she origially fell for, in fact, show her how you are a new improved version of that man she fell for. (dont tell, show!)

You HAVE to focus on you! You HAVE to be the best person you can be, intellectually, emotionally, spiritually, physically - look to improve in all these areas. You deserve it.

Dont tell her you are going to the gym, let her notice. Dont tell her you have been reading self improvement books, or developing your spiritual side, let her notice in your behavior. Dont tell her you are exploring new interests and have new interesting things to talk about and do, show her!

Regardless of your wife - its the best thing you can do for yourself! When you take steps to improve yourself, your perception on life will change for the better. AKA your life gets better!

If you win your wife back - she will be enthralled with the new you. And if you dont win her back - so what?!?! The new you is going to kill it out in this world and you will eventually meet a fantastic woman who feels like she hit the lotto when you walked into her life! Bank on it!