Exposing at EA

[Still Waters]

Well, just like you all said, she denied, denied, denied. Then she denied some more. She wouldn't even acknowledge that there's such a thing as an emotional affair and she kept saying that they're "just friends."

I did read that book "Not Just Friends" before confronting my wife, and I did try to use what I learned to explain how her relationship with this guy was an emotional affair that would seriously damage any chance we had at reconciliation. But nothing I said made a dent. I stayed very calm the whole time and didn't get into an argument. I just told her how I felt and what my boundaries were. But she's in total denial and refuses to limit her relationship with this guy. She even gave him a job at the place where she works, so now they'll see each other every day.

I never knew just how powerful denial is until now. Guilt + Denial = Pod Person. It's like trying to talk to someone through a concrete wall! Part of me thinks that she's in such denial that she's even convinced herself that she doesn't have feelings for this guy and that all of this is my fault.

So I've decided to file for legal separation and I'm cutting off all contact with her. Detaching completely. I'd like to say that I can wait patiently for her EA to run its course, but I don't think I have it in me. I'm not her safety net and I'm nobody's Plan B.