Karen, you may be right about your H but I still feel the same about the phrase. I am glad to see that you have recognised and worked on your issues, too often though the advice that OP is just a bandaid stops the spouse from working on their own issues as they feel the waw spouse's bandaid will be a temporary thing and they will just return once it is over. Many will never return from an A or move on to another one and the LBS still waits in limbo. As I said I do think the length of marriage has a bearing on the outcome. I guess we all take what we need from cliches which is a good thing.
