Wow, Mel. Sorry to hear it but glad you found out.
You know, I was reading back through your thread tonight, and saw something that stuck out to me...when you were talking about how spoiled he was growing up, that he got whatever he wanted, lock stock and barrel, and acts "entitled." (I have some really good al anon literature that discusses the "entitlement" of the alchoholic)
Anyway, I wonder if he threw temper tantrums to get what he wanted then, which would explain why he throws them now. And why he's so bloody shocked when they don't do the trick now.
There was a kid on my son's baseball team, the coach's kid, that would throw unbelievable tantrums at games...never got disciplined, instead they caved and gave in every time. I've never seen anything like it. Anyway, I can see him as a grown-up now.
The other part of that is thinking he can do as he pleases...as in A not okay for you, but okay for him. Although I think it's as simple as getting back at you, really. If he was really into her and done with you he wouldn't be spending all his time goading you and trying to talk to you and screaming when you say you don't want to.
Well...I'm sorry for what you're going through, but I hope it does in fact take some of the weight off your shoulders, and his nuclear bomb away, so you can do whatever is next. I have no idea what to say about S13...haven't been in that sitch. I do think kids have a need to feel loyal to both parents, even if one of them is in the wrong. The other parent needs to accept that and not see it as disloyalty to themselves. If that makes sense.
