To make a long story short, I could tell things were going downhill at my company after Thanksgiving. Wanted to not be under the axe when it fell, so decided to not be on this forum or anything non-work related. Continued to work my recovery group.
Had good time with W over Thanksgiving and a nice San Antonio trip with her for Christmas, but was growing increasingly worried. The layoff happened January 9th, and I was walked to the door along with 41 other people from our office of 200. Very surreal. Got a *great* severance package.
That was when I really started thinking. What the hell am I so scared about? That me losing my job would stop any reconciliation efforts, be seen as a failure by W and her family, etc. Finally realized what BS that was.
Job searched like crazy, found a new job, and will start Monday. Very excited, but it's a pay cut and benefits don't start for 90 days. My severance package gave us benefits until the end of February, so only a 6-week gap. Problem is, COBRA is $1,000/month, so that could get interesting.
Much to my surprise, this has been just the shake-up the R needed. As long as I had the previous job and W on benefits, she could coast along. Now, I'm honestly asking questions. Should she even be on my new benefits?
She's not happy with my new job, but also shows little sign of wanting to stay married. So why should she have any say? She just spent a week here getting doctor's appointments in, with little results. Headaches are worse than ever, and she's understandably very frustrated. She even agreed to MC yesterday, but then her doctor changed an appointment, and that took priority. Still, she seems to be opening up to it.
I'm feeling stronger than ever, got the inventory (step #4) done, and shared it with my sponsor (step #5). I think this will head one way or the other soon, no idea yet.
Missed everyone!
Me: 30 W: 28 T 8, M 6 S: 7-27-2007 W filed (again) 3-2011 Served 8-2011 Responded, now dark "I have decided to stick with love. Hate is too great a burden to bear" MLK
