Countdown to New Year, and fresh start?

[istherehope]

So a quick(ish) journal update for anyone who's been curious...

I went to Seattle on my own for about a week, and saw MIL there. I had been dreading the meeting, and even tried to orchestrate it so that I would not have time alone with her. Well she managed to talk about "things" anyway, and basically, in a nutshell, she thinks her son is screwing up the best thing that has ever happened to him :). She can't believe he is blaming me for his own problems, and said she lights candles for us every night, and that she has faith he will come back around. I tried not to say too much, but had been drinking a bit (wine tasting), so I did say that most people would have given up by now. She again said she had faith, and I said I did too.

Now we are in San Diego. We've been here 3 nights, and are driving to LA today, and will fly to Mexico late night. H loves it here, and has made many references to moving here. There has still been no direct conversation about anything, but there is this sort of vague non-committal future talk. He talks about next time we come here, about taking a trip to Paris etc. There has been a bit of bickering on this trip though, and I think it's mainly because I am starting to want to see a greater effort from him. I feel like as we get closer to the end goal, it becomes harder to keep the slow pace. Anyway we've hung out with some of H's family here, and that was good. I think H appreciated the fact that I could get along so well with them, and that they liked me. Things are so much better for us here in the US than in Ireland, and just feel more natural. The bickering, while not good by any means, is indicative of me being more comfortable. I feel like I can call him on things now, but I am trying not to do that too much. I don't want to fall into bad patterns again.

So tonight is that flight to Mexico, where we will again be around a lot of H's family. I am pretty sure that this part of the family knows what has been going on, which does make me pretty uncomfortable. I will just act as-if though, and be as calm and friendly as possible.

Anyway that's about it for the moment. H is out jogging and will be back soon I assume. I'm thinking there will not be any R talk on this trip after all, but if something does come up, I'll post right away.

Hope everyone is doing well!

ITH