I would like to address DIVORCE from the eyes of a child. To all the parents here, what methods have you used to explain your D to your kids? There is no method to take away the pain. What words did you use? Would you have done anything differently? Children are the innocent ones who are impacted. Some divorced parents used books, or counseling...just wanted to hear your story. Your testimony may help other parents who are facing the brutal reality.
We broke the news to the kids gently, together and we thought "ok, that wasnt' so bad" as our 10yr old talked about something else right afterwards like nothing earth-shattering was said. He just didnt' understand what it meant and in his heart it was just a matter of time before stbx and I would get back together. All along, even after stbx moved in his current gf s10 had it in his brain that stbx would move back with me.
S10 currently sees a C and does him a world of good. I am reading "healing the hurt/restoring the hope" written by the founders of the Rainbows program. If you have one nearby do take your kids there, the program is geared for kids who have had a loss (death/divorce/other trauma of that nature). The book mentions how you have to talk with your child and let him express how he is feeling, if your child isn't saying anything it doesnt mean nothing is wrong, he can just be stuffing his feelings, or like my s10, have a huge misconception of reality.
My child never seemed upset nor cried, I thought he was ok, so make sure you know how your children are feeling.
Be not afraid...I will repay you for the years the locusts have eaten Joel2
30something 2kids survivor of S, MLC, A, D I have peace in my heart, at last.
