Divorced, but 'still hopeful' to reconcile.

[still hopeful]

After my trip to Tahoe with XW and our children and the resulting aftermath, I was pissed for a bit and that anger has given way to understanding. I am reading How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie. In it, he wrote that many times when people are doing 'wrong' they cannot see their 'wrong' if they are criticized. This criticism will cause them to be defensive and believe that they are a victim, rather than someone who has been, and sometimes still is, doing 'wrong.'

Looking at myself, I have too often criticized people in my life, and XW has not been spared from my criticism. She has done plenty wrong (no quote marks needed) in our sitch, and I have criticized her far too often, which is completely counterproductive for achieving my goals. I have such a surge of energy to finish this book, apply it to my life and sitch, re-read it, and apply it, and over and over again to become more effective in dealing with all people in my life. Reading, studying, applying, and reviewing...improving myself as my gift to myself.