XH has decended from the cloud of MLC , HELP

[floridababe]

Hi All, I have not been on here since 2003. Alot has changed for me since I was last here. Simple break down of everything

H-43
W-52
M-6/21/90
LU-NIL-7/03
M/OUT- 7/03
Found out @ OW-7/03 (was involved before the move out)
D- 6/23/05 (married 15 yrs- together 17 yrs)

FULL BLOWN MLC, all the symtoms...

Everyone in his family said "you have to get over it, he just doesnt love you anymore". "He is to young for MLC, he just isnt happy." "Get over with it and move on with your life."
Blamed the kids (step ch that he raised from 1-infancy,2-youth's) for everything, blamed me for everything...etc. etc. etc...

Got the OW before the big blast....

3 mos after he moved out of our house and into his own appt, he started the process of divorce. I got a very good atty and made sure I was taken care of. Went to court and a judge made him decide, cause he kept playing the game of postponing. Was very upset that the judge did not rule with him. Seems the judge had the OW's love note in his possession, when he stated that there was no one else(was left in my car after he took her out in it).

Moving forward...we are now 5 yr later and seems that XH and OW couldnt make that grass grow as green as they thought they could..lasted about a yr.

But the children that he wanted no part of back then, he seems to be wanting some time with them now. XH ran into D at her old job. Was sitting there having lunch when D came in. Seen her and walked over to her and gave her a kiss and they sat and talked for 1 1/2 hrs. Asked D for her number and has called her since. D told me he was sorry for the way things went, and also that he did not go to Son wedding a few yrs back, as he was still in bad way (Drinking and drugs) and he didnt want to ruin his day. Also asked for youngest D number to call her as well. Asked her about me etc.. Wants to spend time with our gs now, and wants to see his other 2 gc. I was happy that my d got to talk to XH, they all still love him. They do not hate him, they dont like what he did but I think being older when this happened was alot easier for them.

I DBed myself to get where I am today. My own woman,self reliant on no one.

Me- moved from the state we lived in and started a new life away from the memories. Bought my own house and have a nice relationship with a nice man for 3 yrs now. The R that I am in now is good, but also has some issues and I can say see you later to him as well.

I have a problem now...I have always had a unconditional love for this man XH. I was smart and stayed away and gave him his space and never pushed or never contacted him unless it concerned one of the kids medically.(Once in the 5yrs, when our youngest D had a miscarraige)
But every single day think of him. Now more than ever.


HELP! I know he is out of this cloud of MLC..and I think I want him back.