Jayce and DQ convinced me the only way to get through was I must continue to rock the boat. I totally agree Diane, when we stop R-talking and try to give them space and time they are tickled that we have finally dropped this nonsense so they can be content again in their status quo. For them nothing is wrong and they don't understand how important this is to us.
I will keep asking until I get the answers to how we move forward. No more waiting, now is the time.
When I said "It feels so one-sided to me. Please work on this too. That's when she answered with, "I don't push you away."
Her idea of working on it is to occasionally give in to me yet not still to really want it.
We talked again this morning and she said that much of what you think about H, revolves around sex. For her it is just not that important. As we get older it just isn't that big of a deal.
That's when I said it is a big deal, I don't want to let this part of myself wane. I don't feel any different about wanting sex than I did 20 years ago.
I'm not sure if we will be able to meet halfway on this now. She says she will try but there a part of me that knows it will never be right for us again. She even said it makes her feel silly to be the center of attention... even when it's just the two of us.
So all of the things that most women die for there husbands to do for them: {be romantic, bring them flowers, write flirty notes, hold hands, kiss, snuggle and say "I love you"} make her feel uncomfortable and silly.
No wonder nothing I do makes her feel closer to me. I'm just encroaching on her time and space and taking her out of her comfort zone. I don't know what else to do but these normal things.
