I couldn't post last night. Picked up H at repair shop and he suggested we go out to dinner. We hadn't been "out" for dinner since early summer. He said we were over due. That was nice, we each had a couple of drinks and the food was good. Then we hurried home to watch MSU loose their first b'ball game to Northwestern (at home no less) in 24 years. Tragic!
It's 26 here this morning. We're getting warmer, but they tell us it won't last. I envy you Kansas girls your 50 degree days! There were 3 deer laying in the snow in our back yard this morning. It was still dark, and they were "lounging" around our apple tree. Kind of funny. At first glance we thought maybe one had been hit and crawled there, then we saw two more. Our snow is so deep they can't get to the hay in the feild, so they are just chowing our trees. They were gone by the time we came out to leave for work.
H had to drive me this am since he is w/o a vehicle for a couple of days. This is a bad reminder for me, because we did the same thing this time last year. When he picked me up (in MY vehicle) last year, OW called him on his cell to "finalize" arrangements for him to take her S14 to the MSU b'ball game. I thought it was a bit strange, and asked how she had gotten his cell #. He said, "I don't know, probably her H." He went on to say that he thought it was weird that she had called him several times that day to confirm the details. I agreed, strange.
What I didn't know till this year, was that he had already been sleeping with her. Ouch! So I guess this is painful flashback. I have a very good book "more than just friends", and it talks about recovering from infidelity. It spells all of this out in great detail, so I know that I am pretty much on track with my feelings. It is so good to know that I am not crazy, and that H's quick feelings expecting me to get over it are oh so normal.
I just have to keep focusing on all of the good steps. Like dinner last night. And he packed my lunch for me this morning. Yes, I have to remember those things, and keep myself busy at work today. That shouldn't be hard since my boss is due back from the Obama inauguration today. She will be wanting to make up for lost time.
I hope that you are all keeping warm. I am sending hugs and good thoughts to you all. SC, haven't heard from you in a while, I'm glad you came by. How is your S doing? Both of mine have been giving me small fits lately. Nothing major, but enough for me to realize that if you are a parent, it never ends. Hang in there!
MT? You seem kind of quiet to me. Are you "processing?" I know that you are a wonderful W and your H is suffering from a bad case of the "crainal inversion" that we talked about last fall. He will pull his head out eventually. Untill then, I used to tell my H that "you're gonna miss me when I'm gone." I still say that once in a while. It helps to make him stop and think. After all, we can be gone, for any number of reasons.
Kel, How is it going? Since we are down to one vehicle right now it might be a bit before I can answer your message. If not before, I will get some time alone by this weekend.
BG, how are you baby? I wish I could come right out there and wrap my arms around you. Or if not for your kids, pluck you away and deposit you here with me for a while. I would love to get you in to the docs that I have seen, let them put you in to their programs. Being so close to U of M and MSU we have some wonderful collaborations and cutting edge treatments. Either way, they have come so far with health care that huge gains have been made in the last few years. The biggest thing to do is relax and have the best attitude that you can. Kick him to the curb. He does not deserve you. Just breathe and keep your chin up. All will work out the way that it is meant to. You have a wonderful family and I can tell that they love you very much. Make yourself a priority now. Be the woman that your H is going to miss. Because no matter what he says, he will miss you. His head is inverted right now, the hold over him is strong, but evil rarely holds on forever.
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
Hey Hope, Glad you had a nice dinner! That is an awesome step!
I am quiet because nothing really going on I guess. I haven't seen H since Sunday morning when we got home. He has called everyday, but that is all. We haven't been on the phone long at all for any of the calls. He always calls me at work. Usually around 10 which is his break time and he doesn't usually go anywhere for that break. At lunch he leaves to go to the store where OW works. Last night I thought about stuff, and I have done all that I can do. I will wait and see if on Friday he wants to go to the bank and eat Mexican, if so I will tell him my speel, and see how it goes. I know that if we aren't supposed to be together that God will get me through and I will find someone who the right person for me. I wonder maybe she is just a wonderful person who was in a an abusive relationship before, and my H was able to save her from that.
Right now I would say he is content where he is and feels that he just needs to "check" on me, because each time he asks me if I am OK.
My home computer has died, the hard drive, and it is here at work getting fixed. They asked me, what do you HAVE to HAVE! LMAO! Well I would like everything. I am not one who saves in one place like I should. I have lots of things on my desktop. I am glad this didn't happen next week when I have started school stuff. So now I take my work laptop home.
I am so glad Hope that you have such good progress occurring! It makes me feel so much joy for you!
I wonder maybe she is just a wonderful person who was in a an abusive relationship before, and my H was able to save her from that.
MT - "Wonderful" women don't let themselves be saved by married men. Period. Don't you dare think that she is in any way better than you! Don't make excuses for them. What they are doing is wrong. For any reason, it is simply wrong. In no way can she be more wonderful than you, his own wife!
God WILL take care of you. I believe with all my heart that everything will work out the way that He means it. And forgiveness is a very good thing. It is a healing thing. Embrace it, but don't excuse her.
I am sorry to hear about your computer. I also am quilty of not backing mine up properly. That has stung me twice over the years. I need to invest in one of those $100 notebook drives to save stuff to. Monna'haveta get around to it, one of these days.
I was wondering when class would start back up for you. Enjoy your last week off lol.
Your plan for Friday sounds good. I really hope that it works out so that you get to talk to him.
Take good care of yourself and remember to breathe.
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
Thanks Hope, I know, had a bit of a lapse there. I know that someone who is that great wouldn't mess around with someone else's H, and she is. The more time H isn't home the stronger I feel at least to a point. Before we had only been apart for a few weeks and then we would talk for at least an hour each night when he was gone. I never thought I would be OK, without him to talk to and I have managed to make it so far. So that is empowering too me. I just need to focus on that.
morning namesake. glad its warming up there for you. we are gonna have nasty weather coming up. so sorry that you are having flashbacks. they suck, I have them often too, since I know what i know now. hang in there sweetie. wish we really could get together, that would help me so much!
MT she is not a good person. no way no how. sorry bout your computer!!
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
He he! I see you're thinking vampire again. Boy could I use another dose of Edward!
Got to tell you that my S22 just finished the series. His gf took them from me to read and after she finished the first one my S picked it up. He was hooked and had to sneak the second one away from her each time she put it down. He eventually passed her and finished all four. He told me that they kind of made him feel sad, in that their R did not have the same intense closeness that Bella and Edward had! Wow! A guy saying that! I told him that was why I couldn't read too many romantic novels like that, I was always dissatisified with reality, lol. So, guess it isn't just us ladies that feel the need for that perfect love.
Most of us are about as happy as we make up our minds to be.
LOL well the quote is sooooooooo true, i love it when she says it in the movie!! cant wait for it to come out on dvd, the second one comes out in november.
here was my D16s tag line today on her im......... Don't cry for a guy, let a guy cry for you. Cause girls give and forgive, but guys get and forget.
M 36 XH 34 3 children If a house is divided against itself, that house will not be able to stand. Mark 3:25 "your mood swings are giving me whiplash" twilight ALIVE FREE AND HAPPY 2010
I wonder maybe she is just a wonderful person who was in a an abusive relationship before, and my H was able to save her from that.