That would sting a little if W told me that - and if that's what she THINKS, that's what she thinks.
Don't forget: perception is reality. Maybe just having some time to breathe is good. Remember that you want to start a "new" relationship.
If you started dating some girl, how long do you think it would last, if you started calling her 5 times a day, and bugging. She'd be like, "Dude, you weirdo, stop calling me!"
Just put yourself back into that position - if you don't stress about it, you relax, are more likable, etc. Plus, if things don't work out, then you're already in a good place.
Trouble is I think I've detached for a couple of days and then made contact so this latest attempt probably feels the same to my H. But patience seems to be the key.
As for your sitch I know what it's like to have kids in trouble so don't beat yourself up I expect emotions were high all round and it's no surprise that you spoke up. However it does seem to have given your W something to think about which keeps you on her agenda not a bad thing. Remember believe only 90% of what they say or something like that.
JDOllie like the advise that's exactly what we want a new relationship without looking for a new person
I am retreating permanently. W is on course for a complete meltdown. I have to wait out the OM if nothing else, and it may end up in marriage, and she may be happy as a pig in poop, too.
Luckily, mentally, I've reached a point where it doesn't matter. There is some curiousity, of course, but I have my focus narrowed to me and my kids.
It's a good place to be - I hate it that I had to reach a point of disgust with W, but it feels good to be released!
I broke NC today but only to pass on a pic my mother sent of her wearing an outfit my wife had sent her last month. I just added a thank you for helping me and that it was sweet of her to have done that. Now that I sent it I'm regretting it a little because I'm expecting a response. She'll probably say something like it was her pleasure and my mom looked nice, nothing special.
I think for now on I wont do that again. I just need to drop off the face of the Earth as far as she is concerned. I hope Karma repays me one day, I've been so nice to her through all of this and in the end I feel I have lost everything regardless.
Me:38 W:40 Bomb/EA 03/08 Recon twice 1/09 W files for D Story
Silva, and really all, I responded on your thread, but here's a good thought. You won't feel this way for ever. As a matter of fact, I guarantee that you will get little twinges in your stomach in the next week thinking about W.
No one can love someone that much, and just drop off the face of the earth. Silva, we are in the same place. Both of us done, and seen the door swing shut in our faces.
But as I said over there, and I'll say to everyone here: detaching is about US!
We deserve SO much better than this - would you work at a job where your boss ridiculed you? Would you eat at a place where the waiter made fun of you, and ignored you? What other place in life would you submit to humiliation, degradation, being insulted, and told you were worth less than cow manure?
I am committed to marriage, but I have stopped trying for my W - she needs to try for ME. I'm about 99% sure that we'll never be together again, but that's OK - I deserve better! I love her more than anything in this life, but I don't NEED her to love me.
Guys/Gals - stop the little pictures, stop the little texts, stop the little phone calls. Give WAS time without you - if they like it, then you'll know it's over, and the pain will start to recede. If they don't like it, maybe things will work out.
