Veronica, thanks for the hug...it does help, believe it or not...it's just a nice reminder to know that I'm not completely alone in my struggles - and that other good people out there are also working hard at getting their lives in order.
You know, you're right that not much has changed - it is but another reminder of how her father behaves - and yet another reminder of where she is in terms of how she sees me...If anything, I can change myself and my response to this situation - and finally let myself grow past it - feel this swell of pain and sadness that has been poisoning me today - and then just start doing things to change my life piece by piece -one thing at a time. I don't have to find the job, the new place and heal myself all in one night, right?
I can't believe how sad it makes me to think that she's becoming more like her parents - allowing her past to ruin her present and her future - rather than being strong and standing up to her past and fighting for herself...it's hear breaking - since, despite what most of my friends and family think of her at this point, she really is a good person - and I know that - I have no doubt about it....I just wish she could find a way to heal...to do the work...even if she never sees me again - just for her to heal would be such a gift.
