Instead of concentrating on what you don't like about your marriage, take some time to concentrate on how you would like your marriage to be.
What parts of your relationship do you want more of? defined time that is set asside each week for us...not just winging it and hoping we get a chance to spend time together
What are the times in your marriage that you'd like to "re-create"? hard to define, probably somewhere in the middle but I will admit that I really liked the guy who first came home, then he was attentive, called alot, initiated physical intimacy alot, called and said things like "I'm enjoying the time we're spending together and find myself wanting to run for more" he also was more compationate and empathetic more sorry for what he put me through in having his a and leaving, spent more qt with me. I feel like I got jipped, like that was all just an act to convince me he really wanted to come home...but it seems he's resorted back to the same man that left...one that honestly I wasn't so sure I was dissapointed about leaving but more that I was dissapointed in his just giving up instead of making a real attempt at making things better.
What are some new things that you'd like to see happen? h to initiate outings more (perhaps surprise me with a sitter and say "hey my mom will watch the kids tonight let's go see what's playing at the drive in" and yes I have stated this is something I'd like from him...actually when he first started to come home and we were talking about our r I clearly stated this...his response...."that's just not me". I would like for h to start saying ily, I would like for h to initiate physical intimacy more, h to want to do a bit more than just sit on the couch watching tv, perhaps play a game of cards or darts one night a week.
"When my spouse stops doing ___________, what will s/he be doing?" when he stops working so damn much outside and at our home, he will (in my dreams but not in reality) find more time to spend with the family and seperate time for us.
