What is it, Unconditional, non-judgmental & open minded, yet we turn it off & on at our own whims, who really wants to be loved like that? Who wants a love from someone knowing that there are conditions to it? If you don't do this, I will stop loving you & if you start doing that I will stop loving you. Again who wants this kind of love, yes our WAS are doing things we disagree with and we hope they would stop, but don't they still deserve love? Doesn't everyone deserve it?
I have to say that I think all the people that post here regularly are all the kind of people that love unconditionally. Sometimes almost too much sometimes. I think that's why we are willing to forgive and work on our marriages if possible b/c of unconditional love.
We also agree that we had problems & caused problems in the marriage too. I have posted many times about the depression I had for the year or 2 before my H began his PA and moved out. I do think there are more positive ways to handle it: suggesting therapy and/or medication or something rather than having an affair. I don't ever think an affair helps a marriage, and often times is kind of probably the needle that broke the camel's back or whatever... I just think you should work on all your problems and try to resolve them, and then if you decide to D, then date. Karen
