Pretty accurate. Got this from attorney's office yesterday.
I offered her the proposal with the EXACT figures that mediator suggested. She rejected it outright. LET THE GAMES BEGIN! What does this stuff mean below (I'll find out from lawyer tomorrow)
Your wife’s attorney filed motions which appeared on the short calendar for next Thursday. If he marks them ready, we will need to go forward. I will need you to complete your financial affidavit for the hearing.
The motions are as follows:
Motion for Exclusive Possession Motion for Child Support and Alimony Motion for Custody and Parenting Plan Motion for Counsel Fees and Litigation Expenses And Mandatory Disclosure –y,
Motion for Counsel Fees and Litigation Expenses Does that sound like your wife wants you to pay her lawyer? No way!!!
Motion for Child Support and Alimony Child support is clear. Alimony hopefully will be limited. SHe already has a good job and can support herself. YOu just have to convince the judge of that fact!
I don't understand your wife's lawyer filing these motions. I thought she had wanted you to work with a mediator. In my state you both would work with the mediator and then present the plan you agreed upon to your lawyers to file (the mediator I went to was not a lawyer and therefore, could not file herself).
I don't understand the part about your offer being rejected. Rejected by your wife??? Mediator??? YOur lawyer???
I have no idea what that means, but it sounds like she wants something free and clear that you both own!
Motion for Child Support and Alimony
Your wife knows she's been getting more than her fair share of the apple. It's customary for her attorney to file those motions. Anything that's awarded (and they'll use the amount of time you've been paying the 62% of your income as an accepted norm.. your lawyer will say it was voluntary and that you're within your rights to change it) to her will be viewed as taxable income and you can write it off.
Motion for Custody and Parenting Plan
Just sounds like you're solidifying what you've done in the past.
Motion for Counsel Fees and Litigation Expenses
I was told that even though my husband outspent me five to one on legal fees that I was still responsible for half of all the fees. My lawyer told me that, the Special Masters.. on and on. They said even if I went to trial that would not change.
You might want to ask about a conflict of interest with her legal counsel, her lover, etc. when it comes to this. You don't know what falls through the cracks, moneywise in her case.
And Mandatory Disclosure -y,
That's just showing retirement plans, etc.. no biggie.. just lots of paper and pain in the buttishness.
Have you done a financial affidavit before? You show your monthly expenses.. yours.. not what they were when you lived in the big house. Your rent, utilities, gas, medical, anything you pay. Your expenses will be lopsided because you've been taking the hit for the family. Include everything you spend money on.. for the vacation you're saving money for for the kids, gas, tips, the new car.. etc. It's okay if your expenses are greater than your income. It shows the court how much it costs you to live.
Ask your lawyer.. or ask around.. what the savvy thing to do is.. move to a better apartment with more bedrooms (which you'd have to do anyway).. you want there to be room for the kids especially with a parenting plan being set up.
They are and aren't games. Spouse got into a "I'm a warrior" kick and blew through all our money, over a basic settlement.
What does your lawyer say is the most likely outcome? It's formulaic. How much does this differ from the mediator? Be upfront about her current relationship with her attorney boss and your concerns.
Thanks, Mattie and Gypsy. I meet with my attorney tomorrow. I do have to go to court on Thursday. I sent my STBX the EXACT figures that the mediator proposed as FAIR. STBX is very unhappy with this. You know what? Too bad!
She shot back an email "She never discussed these figures with me". I SENT HER THE EMAIL FROM THE MEDIATOR WITH THE FIGURES I PROPOSED THIS MORNING. "PROCEED ON COURSE....YOU ARE CLEAR TO FIRE!!!!!!!"
None of this is of my making. If both of my kids have to go to state schools, so what? The University of Connecticut is the best public college in New England. HER LIFE STYLE WILL CHANGE. Too bad. I AM NOT the person I was two years ago. I have a life ahead of me. If she has to sell the house, so be it. DIVORCE MAKES US ALL POORER. She took the kids skiing for two days this weekend? Hmmm?
She took the kids skiing for two days this weekend? Hmmm?
And my ex just came back from a five day vacation with his GF. Just before he left he went to a boat show.....looking for a bigger boat. And he ALWAYS gives me the "poor me" story! LOL
Price out reasonable rents for a bigger place; better to get it in writing from a realtor. That should be the cost that is figured in your financial affidavit. Include the costs of EVERYTHING that you have to pay for, including 1/2 of the summer camps, medical, dental, whatever else you are going to pay towards.
