Thanks guys, Fib, I have spoken to several. No options but to file and proceed with divorce or not file. They advised me to file as I have ruined my future waiting as long as I have already. They told me the divorce gets moved along - I cant stall it.
So, those are my choices.
I wish I could just let him sit here and go about my business. I have for a long time. He was happy to finally be able to move out, but he wanted to do it slowly for our son. That may be what he is doing.
I could just wait a week or two to see if that is it. I already told him we needed to talk when he returned. He just leaves and stays away and comes back when he feels like it.
I am feeling so torn. I am feeling being taken advantage of. I am losing respect for myself as I dont have a backbone, it seems. I have let him do it all his way for the most part.
He has not changed his mind once in 19 months. He held on for our son. I really think he is done.
And I am kinda tired, too. This takes its toll, no matter how much you GAL, no matter how much you try to have a positive attitude, no matter how well we get along, it takes its toll.
I have been with this man for 30 years. It is hard to let go. And I dont think I can do it while he is still in and out.
If I could figure out a way to do that, I would. If I chose to move forward, it is the beginning of the end. I will have to file, and sell my home, and get a fulltime job with benefits. Not easy in this economy. ANd I will have to really and truly say goodbye to my friend, my partner.
