Just some journalling .... about my one and only sister!
My sister and I have been somewhat estranged for several years (actually, there has always been a distance between us since I was little - she is 9 years older than I). When my seizures first started, she did send me flowers which I thought was really sweet. That was August 2008. Last night was the first time I actually heard from her ... we were talking on the phone, actually in a really pleasant way when I went into another seizure. Quite a bad one. Ugh! She told my S21 she would phone back today, but she didn't - that is typical behaviour. I fell asleep on the couch tonight, otherwise I would've called her, but maybe I shouldn't. It takes a couple of days sometimes to get over a bad seizure, so I'm still somewhat groggy and my brain feels muffled.
I have always wished for a better R with my sister. I don't know why we are so distant ... it's been that way for so long. I went through a time when I looked up to her, and agreed with everything she said, but she is the type, unfortunately, who cuts you out of her life if you somehow disagree with her. She can hold a grudge for years for the smallest slight. Also, she can tease you, sometimes mercilessly, but does not appreciate you returning the favour. She is seldom willing to listen to you and take someone else's point of view into consideration.
I love her, but I decided awhile ago that she must come to me now (I have always been the one to go to her, to make friends). I was very surprised to hear from her last night. I hope this is a first step.
Now, the above makes my sister seem like a really awful person, but those are just the traits that I find negative and hurtful to me, personally. Generally, she is a funny person, very intelligent, great at telling stories. She sure has had her fair share of pain, and illness. Stomach cancer which she survived after a lot of pain (her stomach was removed), multiple heart bypass surgery, HBP. I am an example of blooming health in comparison. She has come through all this like a real trouper and I admire her strength and bravery.
Ah well! Family! Watcha gonna do, 'eh!? But, these peripheral R's do influence one's marital R and the ones you have with your children, in some ways, even if only a little. I think I have to just accept that we will never be close ... not at our ages. Sad, really.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
This is so very true. I have an older sister who is like a light bulb, sometimes very bright, other times no one is home. She really doesn't reach out much, doesn't want others to involved in her problems. If it wasn't for her husband, I don't think she would be in touch with reality some times.
No solutions/answers on the seizures yet? You are on my mind and in my prayers. Still S.O.S.O.?(Same old same old)
I have a similar R with my brother. He left home at 17 and now lives at the opposite end of the country to me. I once invited myself to stay at his home thinking that our children should get to know each other better. BIG mistake I have never felt so unwelcome in somebody's home. Last time he came to me he drove 5 hours to get here, should've stayed the night (it was D18s bday party) but drove all the way home again b/c he took a dislike to something my mother said!
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15
Sad when one's relatives are so sensitive to every little thing. Life is just too short to spend time holding grudges, or wishing that something could be different after years and years. Have to move on and let it be. My sister was telling me that she is not speaking to me eldest brother for some of other reason. I didn't even ask why. She has still not called me back, and I don't know my niece's number. Eh! Whatev!
Sure don't need any added stress.
H and I went to see that Mall Cop movie (not sure of the real title). It was very funny! I am into watching stuff that makes me laugh and lifts my spirits. I am going to try and lower my time watching the news ... it can be such a downer watching news about wars and hunger, etc. Although, that plane crash/landing on the Hudson River in NY, was just amazing. It made me feel that there is hope in this world, that some plane crashes are survived by everyone. That there can be peace, there can be positive change. And it shouldn't come just because there is an American black president (although that must be so inspirational for every African American). But, because each of us wants it. For our marriages, for our children, for our jobs/careers, our communities, and so it goes outwards like a ripple in a pond. We all should just wish it to be so. To pray for that.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
There sure is a buzz around America. Sully or the Inauguration are the lead off of every news cast. We can all use that feel good feeling, it would be great if it lasts!
Maybe it will spill across the border....good luck!
Live your life while you are still living. Riding the trail less traveled.
I think it has, WCW! I am watching our Canadian News now and, of course, they are covering the inauguration of Pres. Obama. I hope this feeling of hope and positiveness makes a difference on the stock market for awhile. Sure is a historical moment. I wonder when we will have a black/chinese/east indian president here. Probably not a big enough group yet. I am sure all the Americans on the bb are very excited, and so you should.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
There aren't too many countries in the world where you have such an orderly and peaceful transition of power - even after 200 years of this. Although I did not vote for him, I wish President Obama well and hope the world does not throw too many curve balls at him.
Me 52, STBEX 52 D 17, S 12 M 20 years Em Sep since 2002, Phys Sep Sept 2009
Some news ... it seems my little shadow on my brain has grown. So, I will be having an operation some time in the next month - biopsy and removal. Hope it's not the big C, but whatever it is, I want it out of my head!!
I would appreciate any prayers and positive thoughts, especially for my family because I think it's worse for them to have to watch me go through this.
Me:57 H:52 M:28 Got another lawyer last year and filed. D35,S/D twins28,D22 EA4/04 End? Who knows? "Life is like a mirror. Smile at it and it smiles back at you." — Peace Pilgrim
Just happened to notice you on here just as I was about to log off for the night. Haven't swung by your thread b4 but it aint far 4 me since I am in piecing-ville too.
What caught my attn was your mention of prayers for the "shadow" on your brain. I know this sitch all to well unfortunately as my darling had a tumor diagnosis at her brainstem just as we were about tobe M'd about 7 yrs ago. So I know (from the spouses spot) what that is like.
Thanks for the update BeingMe. You are always in my prayers...but I'll happily include your loved ones as well.
I had my tonsils out last week, my first surgery ever, and I'm sorry you have to do that, there's just absolutely nothing fun about it! But I hope the surgery goes well, that the shadow is benign, that you heal quickly and are relieved of the seizures you've been dealing with.
