in a galaxy far, far away...

[faithisbelieving]

BM...as many will tell you, the decision is yours to make. For me, I knew when the hurt became too great. I COULD NOT LIVE with other men in my life with a new one every 6 months.

When my W gave me her littany of complaints, I listened, told her I would change and make her fall in love with me again.

What do our WAW's do?

I think, sometimes, the most basic thing we heard in school rings true, "if you love something, let it go...."

IMO, filing for separation is a better tool for the W than the H. The woman must be supported if the H is the main provider. A dose of reality may be a kick in the pants.

As for fear, it will always be scary. Fear is one reason why many choose to stand.

BM...step away from DivorceBusting and that 'hope for reconciliation'. Step into reality-based thought...and tell us:
1)Is your H making any effort to reconcile?
2)Is his presence here advancing your efforts or are they being destructive?
3) Knowing that most separations end up going to D, would separating provide any benefit to the M by giving space, distance, etc? My 2 atty's told me that the ONLY reason to file for separation is if there IS a chance at reconciliation

Don't forget....Michele discusses the last tactic, called the LRT, or, last resort technique. But..if you use it...you must be prepared to go thru with it.

In my PDF on women's infidelity, there is a story of a man who went thru the affair crap twice by two wives. After the first wife, he learned better. He wrote a letter to his wife telling him that if she returns back to the M, he would make a 100% effort and commitment to the M forever and work with her and do whatever was necessary, etc, but, if she didn't, he was not going to let her destroy his spirit.

Would a final M talk and LRT be indicated now? Only you can make this decision. Don't make this decision rashly, however, don't let fear keep you in a position of being hurt.

FIB