Frankly K, he has nothing to do with the scars. He caused them with his actions but he can't have anything to do with healing them. You have to heal them on your own. You know that your H is not responsible for your happiness just like you are not responsible for his.
Get back to no expectations. I know that you think you don't have any but really you do. Somewhere in your subconcious your mind is playing a dangerous game with you. 'If he would only say/do this then I would feel this'. That comes through in your posts. Let it go, it's not going to happen. He isn't emotionally mature enough to listen to what you have told him you need. He doesn't even know what he needs to feel happy so how do you expect him to be able to do anything to help you feel your happiness?
See, vicious cycle.
Be you, the happy, sunshiney you. Let go of the bitterness of not getting answers. Let go of all of it. You will be just fine with or without him. You know that you can't have him in your life the way he is because he isn't supportive or loving. You need that and he can't give it. Push away, respect him as the father of your children, but learn to do everything on your own. I do mean EVERYTHING. It will build your character and self-esteem to new heights and you will finally get back to your joy.
I know this has rambled on and on. Sorry. Trying to pour my thoughts for you out without overthinking.
