Rebuilding trust - what are reasonable requests?

[saffie]

In my sitch TIME has been the biggest thing in rebuilding trust.......and my H's patience,

I could tell that his attitude just changed completely. He read books about infidelity describing what it was like for the betrayed spouse and he really took those feelings on board. He has been reassuring when I have been nagging and doubting. There has been 100% transparency. I have just been able to tell that he really wants this to work. When he forgets to tell me something that then sends me into a spin he changes the situation as soon as he can and puts my mind at rest. I can say that he has not once not been able to 'prove' his innocence.

We talk about the M all the time and check in with one another to make sure we are happy. We know we are over stepping the boundary with someone of the opposite sex if we find we are saying something we wouldn't want our S to over hear.

But even with all of that.....it takes time......and eventually a bit of faith and being willing to put your heart out on the line there again. You will never recapture the original innocence of your M - that's gone....but in return you will have grown and learned from what happened.

Good luck. It is worth the journey.