The unfaithful wife...that's me..

[K4D]

Not that I recommend this. But a friend of mine had an affair. She confessed to her husband and gave him the ultimatum. He could either forgive her and they reunite and her never to be made to feel guilty about it, or he could divorce her. This way it at least cleared her mind of feeling guilty and he had a choice to fix the marriage and make it better or move on.

Sounds kind of harsh. But it forces him to make a decision. Does he love you or not. Is he going to stick by you and move ahead with you or move on.

I think right now he is feeling vengeful and the alcohol as I know from my own personal experiance greatly warps your point of view and whats important to you. I realized once I quit drinking just how important my wife and kids were to me and I am still fighting for dear life to keep my W from walking even though I have successfully quit and done things she has asked.

My wife was seeing another guy and I forgave her. I wish my W had your convictions of trying to fix things after seeing changes.

In all honesty, as long as he is drinking like a fish and watching porn and hanging with OW, you don't want him around you and your daughter anyways. You want your marriage fixed, but it can't be fixed until he works on himself and right now, he is not willing to do that. The best thing you can do is hang back, be there for your daughter, go to church, stay involved at church and pray that he straightens up his life so that he can realize what is important to him. He can't see it until he comes out of this lifestyle. Once he does, he will be able to see it.

I was.

Kevin