That is very weird. So hard to know what is going on, isn't it. You handled it so well. All u can do is leave him be.
Do you think he was projecting when he said the comment that "you make him nervous".? Maybe he is worried that he makes you nervous.
Me: 46 H:44 Together: 25 years Married: 20 years Separated: 11-30-06 Divorced 12-21-07 OW: EA began 2005 PA began end of 2006 3 children,20, 16, 6 ex asked for forgiveness 01/16/11
Two weeks ago he made some ridiculous comment that he had to watch his behind around me for fear I would call the police on him (due to the incidents of three years ago). I could not believe he said that so this is just a continuation of that BUT I think his brain is being filled with mush right now.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
I've decided not to take it to heart the nonsense about my making him nervous.
By the way, he is planning on coming over on Tuesday.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
M, The nervous comment is about the incident a while back, but I think what is happening is that he's starting to revisit all of the stages and that happened quite a while ago. He's got to go back and revisit his life in the "mlc land" one last time and then move forward. Personally, I think he's running out of excuses not to come home. This is the final excuse about being nervous around you. If you were going to call the police on him again, it would have been only if it was justified and you've had no cause to do so. I'm glad to see that you've let that comment roll off your back.
You must not be making him too nervous if he's coming over Tuesday. I wonder what he's got going on today?
Enjoy your week.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
He is probably taking a break since he came over Friday, Saturday, and yesterday.
Is it my imagination or does it seem like he is coming over more and more.
I think I seemed a little miffed after he made the nervous comment because I not only let it go but I did not talk to him at all except to let him know what time to pick up D16.
She told me they spoke of "old times" and that is why she did not come home for awhile plus they went to grab a bite to eat.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
Your h is spending more time at your place than at the "dark" closet. From your daughter's comment....he's revisiting the past right now. He's comparing what he had pre-crisis, what he had/has right now in crisis and what he should have post-crisis. They all go back and revisit everything one last time before determining whether to come home or stay in the cocoon of mlc.
Continue as you have been. Enjoy your week!
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
I really look forward to hearing if my father in law will contact H after he receives that letter. Considering the circumstances of my h still in a r with ow, I am not so sure FIL will be too overjoyed to hear from his son.
This certainly seems to go hand in hand with him revisiting past, present, and future.
Gee, I feel like I am living in an episode of The Christmas Carol.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
Your h is actually living the Christmas Carol as we speak. It's all part of the healing process for him. He's been in crisis for a long time and now that he's starting to wake up, just like Rip Van Winkle, he will need to go back and revisit everything before finally emerging from that nap a whole, mature man.
He said he wrote to his father....did he say he mailed the letter? Let's hope is father will be receptive and reply back to him.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
Yes, he did mail the letter. He did not ask his father for anything, just said he was still unemployed and that is all I know. I did not ask him the details.
The Bomb: 08/05 H moves out: 06/2006 H moves back: 01/07 & Out again: 01/07 H moves back: 03/08 & Out again: 04/08 H moves back: 05/09 & Out again: 07/09 Divorced 08-12 Kids: 22, 20, 19
Good! At least we know that your fil may have received it by now or early this week. Your h opened the door for communication and I'm glad he didn't ask for anything yet. I'm hoping and praying that your fil will open his heart just a little and come to realize that his son needs him now.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
