We talked about a little tonight and she says it really doesn't bother her emotionally, its just dealing with it in school. She says she's not drepressed she know what depressed is and she isn't. anymore talk about it and I'll move out.

she seems very aggravated to me, especially this week. She is a 17 year old girl who just found out her ex boyfriend has leukemia, her best friends grandma dies that she knew real well, all this with school and the ongoing family saga. I was told to not push her or critisize or anything, she wil come out of it on her own. Sounds like familiar advice. I told her I am here for her anything, if anything seems like it is getting too tough, tell me, let's see if we can't get thru your situation together. I won't make more out of it because it seems to fuel her rage.

My MIL is coming north Wednesday for a week. she is spending two nights here with me because W has only one room. I am sure W will be sleeping here. First time since September when her mom left for Florida. I have a few things I willget done before she gets here. I am sure she will be impressed with things around the house, MIL not W.

I am doing well staying away and limiting thoughts about W. When the thoughts dome in the rage pushes 'em out. the walk is going good, I am talking to myself out loud now. Back to the gym and it felt great. My buddy was playing last night and I guess I was on everyones lips last night. He told me I could run for mayor down there and win. He told me, "I'm telling you, the way you are, confient hold your head up and telling jokes to everyone, you are the guy everyone wants to be with". Very nice to hear.

Not sure what is up tonight. Really want to get some things done, but I am tired of sitting here. We'l see. The walk is good and I am feeling a little, less chained...Good choice of words on your part. Older D called last night and told me she is trying to get a hold of her mother. She was being crazy about it. she was saying things like what if there was an emergency we can't get a hold of her. I told her well thats between you and her. she asked me if I have talked to her and I said no. Not since last friday and that qwas that.

Anyway, followed up with her this morning and she was better. she just wanted to call to tell her about MIL coming up because MIL couldn't get hold of her.

Anyway this rage thing is working for me. although I can already feel that energy draining. Which is good , don't get me wrong, the energy comes from pain and anger and as it dies, so will the rage. Hopefully I'll be over the hump. If not, I am sure that will generate a little more fuel. There is a new thread started called DA, Dettach anonymous. I have read some of them and I will surely participate there. Thanks for looking in on me. D17 will be fine, I 'll still hawk her, but for the most part I will leave her be as she has insisted. HAve a great weekend, mine, hopefully will be busy. Need some motivation. Church early tomorrwo, back to the gym and then the plaster moulding, maybe a little painting and hanging a shelf. I hope I get the motivation to do at least that much.