Two WAS's- is it really meant to be or walk away?

[Loving_Life]

Thanks Nik for all the thoughtful comments! I really appreciate that you spent the time reading my posts and helping me see that yes, I have done a lot for my sitch.

I was kind of wondering if the ball was truly out of my court and I think I see now that it is. I've GAL'd and LRT'd so much that I'm in a different city with a new life and new friends, not contacting stbx. I'm going along with the D. I'm pretty sure he knows that my door would open a little if he pursued. It's up to him to pursue if anything is to happen at all anymore, right? I wonder if I screwed it up by not building 'friendship' a little more during this S. But, I keep thinking would I get anything out of that? Why should I be killing myself for something mediocre?
I know it has made him curious and a teensy bit jealous when he hears about my 'new life' but if my GAL and acceptance of his feelings is not enough to do anything, then nothing will be able to turn him around. And if he won't turn around, it is not my loss, it's really his loss.

During our first S, he did call me all the time for 5 mo straight. I was still living in the same town, but he was definitely more 'attached' to me then. Now, we haven't talked much at all and we've never been apart from each other like this. I haven't seen him in 6 months. I haven't heard his voice on the phone in 3 months.

I have some exciting new prospects for jobs, and I'm planning how I will decorate my new place when I get it. I'm an artsy/craftsy person so I'm making things for my new place and I finally get to do whatever I want! No debating with stbx about colors or styles or anything. Also, I'm getting invited to so many things that I have to pick and choose now, which is fun! Positive thinking! It's my lifeline and it's amazing how it turns one's life around. I'm also reading books about releasing Rs in love, and that's helping me. On my best days I realize that if I truly care about stbx, I want him to be happy and if that means for him he wants to be left alone and be in his studio and live an independent life with no distractions - then that's what that means. I actually told him that 'it's ok he feels that way, I understand" and that "I forgive and am moving on" a few months ago and he felt "relieved." He wanted to talk longer during that convo, but I "had to go" after a 1/2 hour. That was our last phone convo. Then, he asked if he should call me again and I said "email me" He hasn't called since, is this my doing? A teeny voice in my head wonders if I killed any possibility of piecing by saying that? Maybe I should stop the blame game on myself . Oh well, anyway, I guess that was good overall - at least this is a peaceful transition.