Nothing much to report, I get the feeling that my wife is in the separation phase again. She doesn't want to give me mixed messages whatever that means.
Question does anyone find that after awhile of your stomach getting in knots you almost don't care anymore. This week it is hitting me more about the reality that she has admmitted the physical affair but still keeps contact. I think about her this week and say to myself, I have made mistakes but she doesn't deserve me.
Now don't get me wrong I love her and want reconciliation. I know I haven't been at this as long as some but somedays it is hard to put aside the fact she has had sex with another man and still doesn't know what she wants.
I know I am supposed to be positive etc. and thought stop but this week sucks and I need to vent. I want to tell her to s@#T or get off the pot. I want my life back. I am thankful I don't have kids right now and admire the strength of those who have kids and are going through this.
Anyway this post was a bit selfish.
Jeff
ME 44 W 32 M 5 T 6
no kids
June 08 I don't want to be married it's not you it's me
