I am starting to feel like a psychologist when I read some posts. But I am definately not sick and tired of you complaining and moaning. A few things jump out at me when I read your recent posts. I really respect the fact that keeping the family unit together is important to you. I would opine that it is the only thing keeping you in this marriage. That is a sad realization and I may be off base a little but I doubt it. Whatever feelings you had for your husband are gone (or at least they do not come out in your posts). The fire is no longer there. For some reason I keep thinking back around Euro 2008 and how hard you were fighting. I do not feel that passion anymore. The reasons for the change are yours and yours alone and I respect that. What also is becoming clearer to me is that your husband has not changed. He is who he is and you may be expecting him to become someone he is not. You may want him to be more like someone else. The husband you describe here K is not even really a husband...more like a roommate. However, it sounds like he has always been this way. So do you actually think he can and will change? It has been three months that you guys are trying to piece this back together and I have yet to read that he actually did or said something concrete. Maybe him admitting that he had no idea of the pain he had caused you is one. I can accept his refusal to talk about the past (EA etc.) but I have difficulty accepting that these are the actions of a man who is "fighting" to get his wife back....a man fighting to get his family back. It just does not add up in my simple mind. Either you do not write the whole truth (I am sure you are being truthful) or he is not sure he wants back in. That is my conclusion K. He lacks the motivation to put forth the effort to make this thing we call a relationship work. Lastly, (this is along post) for the first time I sense your fear. Fear of the future ..... I think deep down we all have fears we need to overcome.
