Time for me to change....scared as Hell! 2

[theotherhalf]

I value EACH and EVERY person on this board lwb, as you can well see, I need all of the help I can get. But I have to learn to have faith in ME above all else. Honestly I do wonder sometimes if I should follow advice of someone that didn't R with their spouse. But everyone here says the same things. D or not we still have to do what is right for us (the LBS). Everything I've done so far has not worked. I'm tired of living like this. No, I won't live like this anymore. So I have to do things differently.

Your right, I do waffle extremely. I'll be the first one to admit that. I know that I will fall again. But on the same hand I know that I am getting stronger and each time will be a little easier. I know what I have to do now and I now know that I deserve and want more than the life I've had for the last 2+ years. And I know that it is up to me to get it.