I've been pretty bummed out tonight. I had to clean some stuff off my computer and ran into a whole bunch of old pictures of my and W together, happy. These were even pretty recent. I don't know what she was thinking.
Today I had to explain the history of events to a good friend of mine. This was probably the first time I didn't cry while explaining. That's a bad sign to me, like I'm getting used to this.
I also have been laid off from my job. I didn't really tell W. Figure she kicked me out of her life, she's not first in line to find stuff out. She txt me to see if everything was ok, that she still cares for me, and if I wanted to talk, she was there....,now? I didn't reply to her. Out of sight out of mind.
She came to pick up my son the other night and came to the front door. She wasn't wearing makeup. I think she's so pretty 'natural'. I didn't know what to say, but I could tell she just had her hair highlited. So I said "did you just get your hair colored". She didn't know what to say either, and replied 'did you'? Anyway, we smiled at each other and both looked deep into each others eyes. I sure wish this was different.
Today I had 4 different friends come by my house. That was nice.
