You see yourself as the damaged party. You feel mistreated & you blame me for putting you there. I ask if you see the role you have played in this situation and you say "I don't listen to you. I make you feel 4th in my life. This doesn't feel right."
Rather than taking proactive steps toward making things better you join me in making our life unhappy. You claim to be a passive recepient to my behavior but in reality you are actively involved. You are allowing a bad situation to continue without fixing it. you are withdrawing from dialogue or actions that could make it better.
In spite of your power to change the situation, you still believe I have dealt you a bad hand.
I'm going to accept responsibility for my part in this situation and learn to fix myself by getting professional help and for a time not dating you. I forgive you for all the mean things you've done and said to me over the last year, for making me feel unloved and unwanted. I'm officially starting over and by taking steps to repair and heal myself I plan to see our relationship in a new way.
I ask you to seek help for yourself. Do not see this seeking help as blame but see it as a proactive step to finding ways to communicate and help our marriage/us.
I love you and believe that you have it in you to be a wonderful, loving, giving, sacrificial, communicative father and husband. I would not fight this hard for our marriage if I did not believe that! I've seen you at times be this way...even just recently.
