You know what, it's amazing to me your SS is so strong! And you're fully right to want to support him 110%. I bet you are so proud of him for admitting he had a issue w. alcohol/drugs at his age and wanting to go through recovery. You're an amazing person too, to be there for him, after everything you've dealt with re: his dad. It's unfortunate his dad isn't that supportive, but he's lucky to have you. I hope he changes his mind about the visits. I think if you said you were going anyway, he might turn around.
DBer since 2003 D - 3/24/09 GAL and DBing for myself