Ok Sandi, I typed up a long response, but it was pretty angry and I'm sure I would have said some things I'd regret later so I'm going to shelve that one for now and just say, I've read what you have said and I'll respond later tonight when I have some time.
Hope4Us, I think I can take what I dish out pretty good, but I am glad that you felt the need to delete the angry post. I do appreciate the fact that you went into the details to remind me of all you went through during the stitch. As I said before, if the A has gone public and the couple is flauting it and doesn't appear to care who it hurts or the consequences, then I can see exposing it b/c it is already exposed! They did that themselves. When you have children in school, and especially older kids, they are very likey to hear it from another person if they haven't figured it out for themselves (as your son did). It is hard for me to imagine a mother lying like that to her child, but then I have to remember how crazy one can be when they are that deep in MLC. There is no excuse, and I am not giving one.....only saying that I know they are crazy when they are like that.
I must have misunderstood about the show, and I do apologize for that b/c I thought the two of you were using the show to try to hurt your W for what she had said in the past about "soul mates" etc.
Like you, I probably should not have written my post with so much emotional pain that was more mine than anything else, so I hope you will take that into consideration. It is my pain H4us that I was really thinking about when I wrote that post to you and was lashing out not specifically at you (at least I did not mean to do that, but it did sound like it) but to anyone in general that does not understand the heart of a WAW and mother. I wanted to get a messsage across to those that would intentionally expose the mother's sins to their children as a way of hurting her and lashing back at her for what she had done.
However, as you have pointed out, if the mother is so messed up that she would look her child in his eyes and lie like that.....then what can you do but try to do what you did? As you said, you have to protect your children. I agree with that.
I realize that when I sent that post it was my pain talking and I should not have expressed it on your thread. We've talked several times about this subject and I think we agree, but we just don't say it exactly the same way, if that makes sense. Anyway, I apologize for upsetting you by "my venting".
I think you have tried for a long time to make this work. I was concerned that you have detached too much and may be at the point of giving up. How ironic if that was to happen just as she was ready to try again to make the M work.
Anyway, I pray that all will be well with you and that your family will be blessed.
Sandi
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
