K I agree this is the last attempt at figuring us out. And I think we have a 50/50 shot at best given his attitudes and previous behaviors. But I know that this is the only real chance we have. For him to step away and see things from a distance. And for him to get some help and support from an outside source (counseling).
I told him in the car last night that the way we were interacting under the same roof right now would guarantee we got a divorce b/c we kept cycling through the same crap. He agreed that it was hurting us more to live together than it prob. will to live apart.
Still hurts but I know it is true.
And I am slightly encouraged by talking to the counselor at school today.
He said that from my brief description of how the past year has gone, the fact that H said what he did in the car last night (he is glad I got to stay home with the kids, his life/career decisions were his decisions and he shouldn't blame me, etc),and that he is going to a counselor, to him that showed that things are turning a corner.
So that's nice. I think one way or another this is going to be the last time H leaves our home. Either he will never come back or he will one day come back and never leave again. If that option should ever arise don't worry this time I will stick to my 'demands' because I do not deserve to settle after all this hard work and sacrifice....
