I think you're right on with the baby step approach. That's the same advice I've gotten from pretty much everyone. The truth is I'm not ready to lay down the rope yet. But something has to happen, there has to be some forward movement. This is killing me inside and killing any hope of a relationship between us.
I'm still shooting for the end of the month. I've heard and understand what she needs, and I thought I'd say something to the effect of "These few things are what I would need so that I can begin to give you what you want, and I'd like to talk with you about those sometime soon." Then just see how she responds. Positive and low/no pressure.
If she does agree to talk, I'd bring up coming back to our bedroom, emotional and physical closeness, and her affair. That one will be interesting. I know a lot more than she thinks I do.
I'm going to journal on my thread later with some thoughts. They're getting kind of jumbled up and I need to straighten them out a bit.
