I have a similar R with my brother. He left home at 17 and now lives at the opposite end of the country to me. I once invited myself to stay at his home thinking that our children should get to know each other better. BIG mistake I have never felt so unwelcome in somebody's home. Last time he came to me he drove 5 hours to get here, should've stayed the night (it was D18s bday party) but drove all the way home again b/c he took a dislike to something my mother said!
Me 43 XH 45 M 2.7.88 Divorce 7.10.09 Kids D20,S17 & D15