Yesterday, I realized I was going to have to have "the talk" in baby steps as H and I had just not really talked about anything in a long time and we could not have months of conversation in an hour. So I asked him where he felt we stood and he told me he thinks we are moving in a positive direction and that he wants to continue to work on things with me and work towards him coming home (although he's not ready for that yet, but I think it could be coming soon). We acknowledged there are areas that we need to work on and that we still need to figure out how to work on them (still no clue on how to do it!!!). Big problem is the emotional distance - can't figure out how to overcome it and get the closeness back. I am very cautious at this point. He's still finding it hard to be affectionate (sex is completely on hold now - which is fine with me - neither of us are ready). Could it really be possible for the WAS to take a while to get to the point of wanting/needing affection?? Or does that really mean he's not that into me? I am going to have to watch his actions closely and see if they match his words.
I was surprised he felt things were moving in the right direction because I really expected more of "I don't know what I want" and "I love you but not in THAT way." He did say he doesn't want to get a divorce and he doesn't think it is the right thing for us. So there you have it.
I am going to have to really digest what he said and see if I want to continue on this path. Part of me wants to and part of me is wondering if this is his way of continuing to cake-eat for a while longer? I mean, I still haven't given him the opportunity to miss me.
What do you guys think?
Would love to hear how the convos go for you guys. Do you both have threads elsewhere?
