For me forgiveness comes in stages. I remember a sermon at church that was all about forgiveness, and how you had to forgive before you could be forgiven. I told her that day I forgave. Of course that wasn't the end. But now, 7 months after it is final and 14 months since I moved out, the anger isn't there anymore. Every once in awhile I'll get a twinge, but it quickly subsides.
Just like the others have said, it just takes time.
As for having to have THAT conversation... not sure that will really help. The forgiveness and healing comes from within you and it won't turn on a dime.
